* it’s been a long day and I’m pooped …

Posted on January 26th, 2009 by melinda in Another day in the life of me.


~~~ I am giving a fair warning chirp to all you peeps who may get easily offended by gross stuff … this may be the very post you want to skip. ~~~

I have had a crappy day so naturally crappy things are on my mind … and to add to that, Anna went to Walmart with my debit card. That was crappy for 2 important reasons #1. I have not been paid since mid December. For some unknown reason, my employer thinks it is logical to pay their employee’s in mid December, thus leaving said employee’s without a pay day until the end of January. Yes, there are probably responsible people who can manage money for more than 45 days at a time, I just don’t happen to be one of them. #2. the things on the list I gave her to buy did not include any good comfort food, sundrop or nicotine products. It did include dog food but I haven’t gotten that desperate … yet.

So what’s the gross part of this post you are now pondering? I would wager a bet I’m gonna tell you. First, let me begin with a question for my oh so etiquette conscious peeps, do you have a weird quirk about ya? Like is there anything about you that is just plain odd? Well if you don’t, I probably have enough weird hangups for all of us, so we’re good. For instance, (leave now, I’m telling ya, it may not be safe from here on out) You didn’t leave did you? Cause you wanna know what gross thing I am fixin’ to tell you peeps about, don’t you? You are some freaky little peeps! Ok, so here goes, one of my quirks is … I cannot under any circumstances go to Walmart without having to use the bathroom … I said that very politely for your benefit, infer what you will. And no, I’m not a picky weirdo chick either, it isn’t just my Walmart, you know the one nearest you that is now your’s, it doesn’t matter what Walmart in what City or State I may frequent … I gotta go. I do not mean the … gosh my tummy is kinda grumblin or the I can hold it till I get home, or maybe the I will just poot & walk off so no one knows it was me … not that kind of I gotta go. I mean the … I will run your slow butt over with my buggy, get the heck outta my way, katie bar the door & break out the frebreeze kind of I gotta go. Yep, there is a visiual you could’ve all lived without huh? remember, I told you to leave, I warned you I was in a crappy mood. You have no one to blame but your little peeps selves for still being here, be big peeps and accept responsibility for your nosiness. Do not bother to pretend like you don’t know what that kind of I gotta go is … liar liar peep pants on fire. So, do you think I have some weird disease? or maybe Walmart is pumping some weird fumes thru their air … I don’t have a clue, but I can tell you this for sure, Walmart is way better than Exlax ever thought about being, at least in my case. I realize there was absolutely no reason to share that with y’all but I just needed a laugh today … now I don’t feel quite so crappy.

Please know this, my children are most likely now terribly embarassed & are busy removing all information from my blog that may include them as we speak. At least I can feel good about accomplishing one thing today!


13 Comments on “* it’s been a long day and I’m pooped …”

  1. Cathy

    Well if nothing else you give me a good laugh, even though I knew this about you already. I hope your day goes better tomorrow. There is no telling what you might tell us if not.

  2. melinda

    Cat, would you like some pancakes & syrup?

  3. Cathy

    That is a whole other topic, but when I do I would like a big bowl of cereal with it.

  4. Heather Sharpe

    we say “fart” at my house.

  5. melinda

    heather, my dahling, you do realize you are my most high faluting friend, right? and now you have just said fart in public. Whatever am I going to do with you?

  6. Thad Bentley

    Excuse me? It’s not only your children that are embarrased. The only difference is that I have the administrators password, so this post may be taken down before anyone else has the opportunity to see it. What were you thinking? By the way, check out the new video on http://www.emmajoybentleybalentine.com of Bapa reading to Emma Joy!

  7. melinda

    oh brother bear, you laughed didn’t you? but you didn’t show it to daddy did you? love emma joy & daddy reading, how sweet that is.

  8. chrisi

    mom- i could’ve gone my entire life without knowing all of this.

  9. Frannie....

    If you pooped at Walmart, why are full of poop today?

  10. Amy Barnes

    This is just way too funny…I so needed a laugh today! I watched the video of Bapa reading to Emma Joy and it’s so precious. I can’t wait til I can read to my lil’ girl. awww…It just brings tears to my eyes. =]

  11. crazeejuls

    I love those “I love you’s” Thanks for sharing!

  12. melinda

    welp in one post, I have made some of you ashamed to know me,given some of you TMI, some of you laugh at me & some of you tell me I am still full of crap even if I have been to Walmart … ahhh success feels so good.

  13. Emmy Black

    Oh, I miss ya so much and you are the funniest person EVER!! I had forgotten the whole Walmart situation!

More News