* never judge a pair of boots by their cover …

Posted on September 27th, 2009 by melinda in my not so normal family

Holy cow … I just nearly had heart failure.  I almost called 911.  I almost had to whoop out my belt (after I found it hidden somewhere in the depths of my closet)  and beat my younger daughter.  She bout caused me to fall out.  Literally fall out in the floor.  I hollared.  I hollared loud.  I hollard “Anna Colleen, what in the crap are you doing laying behind your bathroom door”?  There are only 2 reasons anyone is ever laying behind a bathroom door … #1. they are dead #2 they are passed out.   I was going to take Tulsa to Anna’s room for the night & to tell my younger child goodnight & sweet dreams.  As I rounded the corner to the short hallway leading her bedroom & bathroom this is what I saw …


What would have been your first thought?  Mine was “what in tarnation is going on?  I froze for a second, feeling certain something terrilbe had happened.  She hit her head on the tub?  She passed out?  Is she drinking & I didn’t even notice?  I’m a crappy parent … all of those thoughts in about 1.3 seconds flat.  And then I hear her giggling.  The giggling was not coming from behind that door.  The giggling was coming from her bedroom … what the heck?  I’m confused.  

I sling open her bedroom door to find this …


Well if Anna isn’t passed out or dead in her pants who is behind my bathroom door in her pants and boots?  Great, now we have a potential cross dressing passed out intruder … nice.  I decide I am gonna whoop them, whoever them is, with my belt, when I find it.  Back to the bathroom I go with an attitude.  And this, this is what I find …

007empty pants … no intruder, no anna.  just some plain ole empty britches.  I just nearly had heart failure over a pair of empty pants.  You would think my children are old enough not to leave empty pants wearing shoes laying around for their poor mama to find.  I think they may take pleasure in my near death experiences.  Shame on them!

moral of the story:  sometimes things are not as they appear to be.  be careful when jumping to conclusions without all the evidence or without taking the time to investigate a little further … you won’t look nearly as ignorant when the cops & EMS show up at your house. 

I am so whoopin her tomorrow.


3 Comments on “* never judge a pair of boots by their cover …”

  1. purejoy

    oh, and i am about to peemypants from reading this story!!

    too flippin hilarious!

  2. Jodie

    Sounds like something my kids would do to me, too.
    That’s what hair coloring is for !

  3. Marjorie Markham

    Her hitting her head was not my first thought! Guess I have been behind too many doors. She does look sweet in that bed though. I hated I missed your dads reception. I hope he enjoys his retirement and fills it with lots of stuff like coming to homecoming on the 9th and dragging you along. I think Kevin will be getting a plaque award that night from Kip Mace and the radio station. Hope tomorrow goes smoothly and try not to cry too much.

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