* the check’s in the mail …

Posted on August 31st, 2010 by melinda in Another day in the life of me.

Boo!  Did I scare you?  I bet you were expecting to click on the blog and still see a picture of a big ole cupcake, cause I am such a slacker.  Actually, I’m not really a slacker … I’ve been really busy, but we’ll get to that in a minute.  I have a little blog quiz first. 

Question:  Do y’all know what happens if one doesn’t pay their cable/internet bill on time?

Answers to choose from:

a).  the cable company sends you a nice note reminding you that you owe them money.

b). you ignore the bill in hopes that it will just magically get paid by the good cable fairy.

c). it doesn’t

d). they cut that wifi connection and your tv off quicker than you can say “wait, I get paid Tuesday”.

e). all of the above.

It’s just the derndest thing you ever did see.  One minute you are connected to the world, the next you are on an island in the middle of no cable land all by your lonesome.  I mean, not that any of that stuff happened to me, cause I always pay our cable bill the day it comes in the mail (excuse me while I laugh out loud at that lie).

Anyway, we are once again connected to this big ole world for at least 30 days and I can once again fill your pretty little heads with completely useless but sometimes funny stuff.  Aren’t you feeling relieved?  Ya, I thought so. 

Shall we catch up a bit?  Life at the hacienda has been a bit exciting and boring all at the same time the past couple of weeks.  I am thrilled to tell you that after almost an entire year of looking for a job, Richard is now back to full time employment.  The upside of that is, maybe we won’t be having our cable cut off again in the near future and I can still eat on a regular basis.  I’m not sure if he’ll make enough money to feed the rest of the folks at our house or not, but I can still eat, so all is well.  The down side of his new job is this … he isn’t home all week.  If you are reading this and you happen to be either an axe murderer, stalker, rapist or thief, please disregard the fact that I just informed the entire world (or the 15 people who read our blog) that my husband is out of town all week.  I’m really not fond of pain, nor am I a vision of sexual gratification for even the most desperate on most given days and we certainly don’t own anything worth going to prison for, so personally, I just wouldn’t bother, plus my dog bites really hard … just saying.

Richard likes his new job, Richard does not like being away from home.  If you know him, this will come as no great shock to you.  I would love to declare that he misses me so terribly that it makes his time away heart wrenching and he aches to be home in my arms … but alas, that would be a lie.  I would venture to say its something more along the lines of he misses his junk, he misses Saddie and he misses torturing me by making me watch 72 episodes of ice road truckers, deadliest catch, ax men and repo something or nuther all in one night.

So, whatever shall a girl do while her husband is out of town?  Oh, the fun I am having … please let me share some of the most fun parts of being home alone for nights on end.

#1.  I can eat fruity pebbles for dinner every night and nobody cares.

#2.  I’ve read an entire book and started another one in less than a week.

#3.  I have not gotten my fat fanny stuck in the toilet because the toilet seat was left up once during the last week.

#4.  I had a Mary Kay makeup party.  Let me tell you, we are some hard core party girls up in here.

#5.  It would have been fine if they had only turned the internet back on and left the cable off, I haven’t turned the tv on once the entire time he’s been gone.

#6.  I have discovered that I have some weird hangup about not taking a shower or blow drying my hair while home alone.  I keep getting these Norman Bates visuals, thus, I have to wait until Anna gets home to shower.

#7.  I have not let Dozer and Tulsa sleep in the house one time while he’s been gone, not once.  Ok, that’s a lie, they sleep in the bed with me every night he isn’t here, but don’t tell on me, it’s our secret.

#8.  I go to bed much earlier but sleep way worse.  Maybe it’s because there are 3 giant dogs in the bed with me?

That about covers the extent of my time home alone.  I must tell you, I really don’t like it very much.  I find that I miss coming home to a busy house.  But … I am very thankful for this job opportunity for him.  We can’t always have the best of both worlds and sometimes responsibility comes with sacrifice.  I am thankful for a husband who wants to work and take care of his family. 

And now, I am off to make some chicken salad for my daughters.  We had a knock down drag out and some thieving going on over some chicken salad last week, it was pretty ugly, but I’ll tell you all about that later this week.


One Comment on “* the check’s in the mail …”

  1. Marjorie Markham

    I can relate to # 1,5 and 8. I rarely have the tv on when home alone. The sound of my computer keys pecking away as I talk to you on here, and my family and Facebook at the same time is all I can handle. Glad he has a full time job though.

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